What truly matters for you ? Why are you here ?
This is how I like to start many of my yoga sessions, with a reminder that every chance we have to connect inwardly and consciously, is an opportunity to place an intention for our movement in life.
This is why yoga has been primordial in my life, and this is why I see life as yoga is: an opportunity to live with undivided attention, and to know better and wiser.
What I have been learning primarily through this last year and a half is that a life that is cultivated in strength and ease needs boundaries.
If you want to succeed in life with a regulated nervous system, you will need strong boundaries.
For me this has been a very challenging practice, as the defence mechanism system I acquired as a child was about pleasing in order to be seen and acknowledged.
That translated into naively putting others before me first. I thought that was going to reward me with more love, and thus I could feel my own wound of abandonment covered.
It has taken me all of these years to realise that much of the stress I have suffered of has been due to not knowing how to say NO ( to social committees, to not speak my truth, to be paid less of what my worth is, to take responsibility for things that have not been my own one to take, and to whatever it has not been calling my heart for joy ).
When you endanger your own wellbeing by prioritising others first, is very difficult to know what truly matters because there will always be conditions.
This is why time alone has been primordial to know better about what is calling me for attention, and I will dare to say that this has been incredibly restoring and powerful.
Being In Solitude & Reflection is the practice I do recommend to everybody who wants to live more intentionally. The more time I spend by myself, the more time I need, and the more clarity I gain.
At the end of the day it comes out to something very simple : say yes or no without dilemma and honour what you feel is good for you.
What truly matters for me now is to be gentle and to engage with anything that makes me feel like this. Sometimes this translates into having less things accomplished within a day, and others is about having more spare time without agenda. It has been two years of a lot of emotional, mental and physical challenge and I am the only one who can recognise that, and at the same time I am the only one who should take accountability for this.
Before I would have needed recognition from outside. A motherly/fatherly patting on my shoulders of " take care of yourself ". In this World we do live the programming of " go hard, never stop and play in control " wins better than " be gentle, pause and let go ". This is why for many of us is very challenging to reset not only physically but mentally and emotionally too.
Boundaries are about being fully in charge of your life and knowing how to be with everything that may come across your way.
As nature unravels smoothly towards the end of autumn, and all becomes quiet and ready to rest for the next upcoming months, I know that there is a great power emerging from knowing how to stop and being ready to rest.
Wisdom is something we can only gain from within, is the magic of winter and the consequence of surrendering to the truth of oneself.
I practice this gentleness as much as I know, and I feel that my intention sets organically with nature too.
May it be then.